Don Gross died in a tragic accident at home on January 7. Don was a very important member of our community and touched many of our lives. The Beacon asked everyone to send remembrances or tributes of any length, even as short as a single sentence, for publication in the February issue. Here’s what we received.

Don’s Big Heart

I met Don last year when he called me to do some work on one of the garage doors down at the old RP Johnson facility.

I had just met Don, but he made me feel like I had known him all his life. We hit it off right away, and it was Don’s big heart that made you feel good to be around him.

I told him I was looking for a new place to run my business out of, and he said, “I got just the building for you.” And he did. I rented the old Building Number 2 that day.

From that point on, when I would see Don down at the Blackwater Junction Restaurant or over at the storage buildings, I would always put 10 or 15 minutes aside because Don would love to talk, and I enjoyed talking with him. He was a man of great integrity, and I am so happy to have known him, but so sad that he’s gone.

My thoughts and prayers to his family. Don will be missed.

Jim Buchan
Granite Garage Doors

Story Time with Don

Don and I worked together for three years on the Andover Board of Selectmen. The United States Congress should take a page out of our book, because Don and I were at opposite ends of the political spectrum, yet we worked through the issues and always came up with a compromise that would work.

After our regular meetings, fellow selectman Jake Johnson and I always looked forward to “story time with Uncle Don,” when he would tell us hair-raising stories about his days on active duty as a police officer in Nashua, and even more hair-raising stories about the politics of public service.

Don always said that if I ever needed to find him, he would be at the counter of the Blackwater Junction Restaurant just about every morning around 9. Don, I hope the food at the counter where you are now is just as satisfying, and the company just as good.

Vicky Mishcon

Don was a Good Person

Don didn’t need anyone to think that he was a good person; Don needed to know that he was a good person … and a good person is exactly what he was.

Ken Reid

Champion Christmas Cookie Baker

Don was a sincere man. A simple conversation was all it took to tell that he truly cared about everyone. He never seemed rushed; instead, he was always willing to stop and chat. It was a simple gesture that made one feel important.

He was also a champion Christmas cookie baker who was always willing to share what he baked. He will be so greatly missed!

Christina Alterisio
former teller at Lake Sunapee Bank, Andover

“Well, yah …”

I was blessed to know Don and Karen Gross for several years. I cannot remember a time when visiting that they did not say, “If you or Jean need anything, just call.” Sadly, I got to say those same words to Karen at Don’s funeral and wake.

When WMUR came to interview me as their neighbor, they knew Don’s statewide influence as police chief of Nashua. When they asked me how I remembered Don, I said what anyone else would say: “Don was my friend and always had my back.” I’m not sure that I even thought about the big footprint that he had on New Hampshire; he was just my friend.

This was also brought to my attention by one of my patients named Chris. He would meet with Don on Sundays at Don’s “office,” the Blackwater Junction Restaurant. Chris made note that Don always treated him as “a good friend.” Don had that gift, to make you feel like you really were his good friend.

Don’s other office was his pickup truck. We would meet frequently on our road, stop, roll down our windows, and talk. Don had what I would call “Don-isms.” If something was so obvious that even a dummy would understand, he would lean slightly forward with a twinkle in his eye saying, “Well, yah.”

I find myself now traveling Kearsarge Mountain Road, checking the horizon for my friend. I miss him, and it hurts; but Karen misses him far more. As time goes on, may Andover, may New Hampshire, echo the words to Karen that I heard from her so often, “If you need anything, just call.” Listen closely and you’ll hear Don say, “Well, yah.”

Dan Bezon
Friend, neighbor

Keep It Simple

Since moving to Andover almost 20 years ago, I have grown and learned an immeasurable amount about what it means to be an active member of a small community. Don was a big part of my growth and learning, and I miss him terribly.

I’m proud to have been a small source of amusement to him over the years. He’d stop at the foot of my driveway, and we’d share a chuckle over my flatlander approach to life on the mountain. Whether it was forestry, or excavating, or snowplowing, or some new home improvement project, Don always had a simple, pragmatic suggestion that cut through all my convoluted overthinking and got me back on track.

But what I’ll remember most about Don was his unwavering mantra for doing good in the community, which he taught me as he organized the Andover Food Pantry: keep it simple and direct.

At first, I was shocked by his certainty that rules and forms and such were unnecessary. He wasn’t naïve; he knew there would always be people who’d take advantage. But Don also knew that that was a very small price to pay for getting help to the other people, those who really need it, in a simple, direct, and dignified way.

Don was an absolute master of quietly doing good in the community, and the example he set is one I’ll always remember and try to follow.

Charlie Darling

Remember What I Told You?

When I was hired as Town Administrator, Don gave me some simple yet very important advice: “Do your job, and don’t try to defend anybody else’s opinion.” He went on to say that the Town Administrator is a conduit to and from the Board of Selectmen, so remaining neutral is far more effective than taking a strong position.

Don would stop by to visit and would always find an opportunity to ask, “Do you remember what I told you?”

I’d say “Yes,” and he’d laugh and say, “I know you do.”

That routine never got old, and already I miss it.

Marj Roy
Town Administrator

Don Had the Answers

I speak for all Andover Police Department personnel when I say:

Not everyone gets lucky enough to have someone they can turn to when questions need answering or problems need solving. Don was that type of person.

I owe a lot to Don for the many things he contributed to the Andover Police Department. I believe the new Police Station would not have been built as quickly and or as cost effectively without Don’s input and connections. Whenever I needed advice about police situations or equipment, Don had the answers and the people to go to for those answers.

Don, you will be missed by all at the APD.

Chief Glenn E. Laramie

Our Friend

Thinking about what to say about Don Gross, many words come to mind: Strong, kind, generous, just to mention a few.

I will be forever thankful for the honor and blessing of having known this amazing man. He sure could share a story or two or lend a helping hand when needed. Sometimes just an encouraging word from Don would make your day better!

As I looked around at all the people who came to pay their respects, I wondered how many others he had touched along his journey. I know we are all missing him already. Andover has lost a big presence.

Hopefully we can gather strength from each other as we face the coming days.

Thank you for the memories, Don! “Bear hugs” to you in heaven, my friend.

Brenda Brown

Life is Too Short

How do you sum up in words someone’s life, especially someone as wonderful as Don Gross? Wherever Don was, he was able to light up a room. Whenever I saw Don, he always had a smile on his face. This town has lost a truly amazing man.

Don, I am so happy to have known you, even if it was for a short time. Knowing you has made me a better person and inspires me always to remember that life is too short: live for today, because you never know what tomorrow will bring.

Amy Dillon

Community Spirit and Service

The Andover Lions Club was pleased to welcome Don Gross into the Club when he returned to town from Nashua. Don brought new energy to the activities of the club.

He was a strong advocate for the club to start the Andover Food Pantry and to keep the administration of it simple. He was very helpful in other activities. He shared his truck on occasion to haul the Concord Coach trailer or the food trailer to events.

I personally rode with Don to a Southern New Hampshire horse and carriage show, and we enjoyed fellowship of Lions doing community service. We will miss him greatly.

I have known the Gross family since moving to town in 1972. John and Joan raised a wonderful family, and Don was a great example of community spirit and service. His death was such a tragic loss to family, friends, and the community. May Don Gross rest in peace. May God bless and comfort the Gross family.

Bill and Margie Leber

Wise Words, Caring Man

I first met Don when he was a Selectman and I was the newly-appointed Chief of Andover Emergency Medical Service (EMS). My first impression of Don was that he was a man who gave you his undivided attention when you spoke with him. His interest in what you had to say or the issue with which you were concerned became his only focus.

I think Don sensed my apprehension in accepting the Chief of EMS position, and after one Selectmen’s meeting he made it a point to meet up with me to talk about anything that was on my mind. At the end of our conversation, he quickly and simply summed up my problem and told me, “Don’t over-think it,” and that most solutions are right in front of us if we can only step back a bit and calmly look around. Wise words from a caring man.

Our community was blessed to have him, and he will be missed by many. My heartfelt condolences go out to his wife, family, and close friends.

John Kinney